quiet and chaotic…me

I started this blog a little over a month ago; I was seeking a quiet corner in my chaotic life. This ‘corner’ is so contradictory because I am really an introverted and private person, yet here I am exposing myself to the world.

Why? I don’t know. It’s scary because once we hit publish it’s there forever. What am I doing? I don’t know. But I find solace in this blog on days when my mind is racing and I feel stressed but still have to keep it together so no one knows but me.

It’s therapeutic to write the words, anonymously to a degree, without judgment. My thoughts, me, here, alone but not so alone, and I’m just penning my thoughts, and there are people who connect with me by reading my thoughts. How unusual, amazing, scary, but ultimately it’s kinda cool.

If someone would have said I would publish my thoughts even last year I would have laughed. But here I am. How crazy is that? This ‘corner’ allows me to wind down and center myself. Not sure why or how, but it does. And I am appreciative of this outlet because little did I know, but I need it.

It’s still scary, even after I’ve written over 30 posts – not a lot, but that’s huge for me. I’m the person who get’s you talking about yourself because 1) I genuinely do care and want to know about you, your day, and how I can help; and 2) because if you’re opening up to me then I don’t have to open up to you. It’s scary because I’m journaling in a public forum, and it’s random, it’s raw, it’s me. What in the world was I thinking?

So, here I am writing, posting, learning, and living. It’s my quiet corner, my life is still chaotic, but here I am anyway.

God bless, and be blessed.

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