the aftermath of suicide

Suicide leaves so many unanswered questions. It leaves those left behind feeling helpless, angry, sad, emotionally on overload. Suicide isn’t an answer, it is the beginning of endless questions that loved ones can never really find an answer.

When someone dies after an illness, the pain is still there, but there is some sense of closure. When someone dies due to an accident there are questions, there is anger, there is grief and the “why’s”, but there can be closure.

When someone dies at another’s hands there is overwhelming anger, pain,  grief, and there are still the “why’s”, but there is someone to blame, someone to be angry at, someone to direct the energy towards.

Of course none of these scenarios are ideal, they don’t make the pain any less, they don’t change the situation.

But, when someone dies at their own hands it brings an entirely different level of pain, of questions, of grief. Who do you blame? Your loved one? Yourself? Their significant other? God? Who?

Death is never easy. Young or old, when you love someone you love them. And you want them with you forever. Period.

I recently witnessed the pain, the raw pain, of a young woman who lost her brother to suicide. Nothing prepares you for this. When I walked up to her she threw herself into my arms and sobbed. I held her and prayed. I prayed for her peace, for Jesus to wrap his arms around her and let her know that she will be ok. And I felt helpless. Because suicide is not an area that I have experience. All I knew to do was to hug her, pray for her, and let her know that I care.

Picking up the pieces is hard. Life continues around you and nothing stops for your personal pain. So I can see this young woman struggling to be “normal” but still have this overwhelming pain. How do you return to the way things were when they are no longer the way they were? What is normal? What is the new normal?

Praying for this family and for those who feel that life is no longer worth living.

God bless, and be blessed.





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