pain greater than love

Heartbreak can be debilitating. Even for a person with a strong relationship with God. Even for a parent who for all purposes puts their child first.

But when you have pain, pain that cripples you, that makes you feel hopeless, well sometimes that pain is greater than love.

I witnessed this type of pain recently. The pain so unbearable that a mother, who I know loved her two children with all of her heart, felt she had no choice but to take her own life. I’ve never felt this type of pain, but now I know it exists.

The woman was an acquaintance. I knew her children, and through her children I met her on several occasions. What I remember is how much she loved her family. How supportive she was of her husband and children. How devoted she was. I remember the love that shown in her face when she spoke of her family. The smile that was immediate when her children walked into the room. The smile when someone spoke of her husband.

But all that changed when her family began to fall apart. And that love became overgrown by the vines of pain. And she faltered. And slowly, or maybe it was quickly, but somehow the pain became the heartbeat. The pain became too much. And when she could no longer stand the pain she wrote a short note to each of her children, saying goodbye, saying she loved them, and she took her life.

And that is what is hard to understand. The love she had for her children was bright and bold. How did the pain become greater than the love she had for her children?

I pray for her soul. I pray for her family. I pray for her children.

And now I know I must pray for those overwhelmed by heartache, by sadness, by depression. I pray that the brightness of love begins to shine for them again, that it breaks through the darkness of the pain. I pray that they find a bright, new beginning. I pray for life.

God bless, and be blessed.

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